This is a chronological list about falling in love with my man, circa 2011.
1 Match.com, Really
In August of 2011, I traveled for two weeks with three friends through five cities in Italy. (More on that later, I promise.) I turned 28 years old in a seaside town on the coast of Sicily. As I was blowing out my Italian birthday candles, a friend asked me what I wished for in the coming year. I think it’s bad luck to share your wish, but maybe the rules are different abroad. I told her I just wanted to find my man!
God and I had already talked a lot about this topic, and I had been feeling a nudge to try an online dating site. The idea was quite a bit out of my comfort zone, so I put it off. At last, I took a hard look at my true desires compared with how I was focusing my efforts in life. I thought if I was ever going to find my man, I had better start prioritizing the search.
As the story goes, I finally followed God’s unexpected direction and established a profile on match.com. A couple of dinner dates and about one month later…there was the man I had been waiting for.
2 Pizza al Fresco
For our first date, Bob met me in the town where I lived at the time. We ate outside at a little table on the sidewalk in front of the restaurant. The tiny bistro table where we sat was on a crooked piece of sidewalk, and it barely held the two pizzas we ordered, but I was so taken with the lovely person across from me that I barely noticed.
Dining outdoors in the warm air with a fresh breeze is one of my favorite ways to enjoy this life. Just being in nature in general speaks to my soul like nothing else does. My new suitor chose a table outside and was waiting for me there when I arrived. The setting was just right.
I went on a backpacking trip two days later, and walking through the blueberry bushes near the top of a mountain, I told my BFF that I had met the most interesting person, and I was pretty sure it was serious.
A match made under the trees? I think so.
3 Music to My Ears
For date #2, he invited me to go with him to see his friends’ band play at a venue in town later that week. He loves music too? And he plays the guitar? Oh, Lord, you know my heart.
On the day that we spoke to make plans to attend the concert, he had called initially to invite me to go along with him that night to a living wake for his friend’s dog. (I couldn’t make this up.) I politely declined. Oh, the interest this man brings to my life!
4 Sushi al Fresco
For date #3, I met him on the deck under the stars and lights for tapas and sushi. We drank wine, and he spoke of riding motorcycles and seeing wild horses on a picturesque mountain in southern California. We sat near some producers who were in town working on the same movie production that he was working on. The stuff of dreams, folks.
I was enjoying his company so much that I agreed to go with him after dinner to meet some of his friends and to see a different band play at a venue up the street. I had dressed for dinner, and so I was keenly aware of the professional working woman black pumps that I was wearing at a rock show. Luckily, I think the rest of my ensemble of black vest and white t-shirt and jeans evened them out (ha!).
5 Hooked
By then I was sure I wanted to spend many more days with Bob from Pittsburgh, and he was so easy to be with it felt like love. Like any good woman, I checked in with my closest friends to get their take on the news.
We carried on. We saw one another often. I declined an invitation to accompany him on a Monday night while he went shoe shopping. I instantly regretted it. He brought me soup when I was sick. He cooked steaks on the grill at midnight for me and his roommate. He lit up my life and loved me well.
6 Runner’s World
I’ve been a runner since high school days. If you have been a runner yourself, you know it’s a tough habit to shake. At this point, after some knee pain, then pregnancy and motherhood have set in, I seem to have settled into a solid post-runner period of life. But at the time I met my husband, I was actively training to run a 10-K later that month.
On race day, the friend I had planned to carpool with was ill and couldn’t make it. (She now rightfully takes her place in matchmaking history.) Downtown parking is a bit of a bear on race day, so I boldly took my new guy up on his blanket offer and called him in my time of need. I phoned him at 7AM on a Sunday and asked him to pick me up from the race later that morning and drive me back to the other side of town where I had parked my car. He showed up with bells on. Obviously.
7 My Ex’s Wedding
He invited me to accompany him to his ex-girlfriend’s wedding. So I put on a kick-ass dress and I went. I remember saying to my co-worker the week before the wedding, “this is weird, right?” But I was confident in Bob. I met my new boyfriend’s family at his ex-girlfriend’s wedding. I’m talking his parents, his siblings and his aunt and uncle. His sister asked me when we were going to have kids.
Trial by fire? I had fun. That tells ya something.
8 Oh Canada
My new beau had never run any kind of distances before, but after we met, he accompanied me on many training runs. (The things you do for love.) Early on Thanksgiving morning, he got to put all those running “dates” to use, and we went downtown to run in the Turkey Trot 5-K. It’s a certain special feeling to run your heart out in the morning and then stuff your face with turkey and pumpkin pie in the afternoon. I miss it. No I don’t. Yes I do. (I told you, it’s tough to give up the running thing.)
Anyway, we got the race out of the way, and then we traveled together to each of our families’ Thanksgiving dinners. After a long day of running and eating and visiting, we wondered what to do next. He said, let’s drive to Niagara Falls. And so we did, straight through for four hours (or five?). Of course, I had to pack and so we didn’t get on the road until 11PM (a speedy packer I am not). There’s nothing like seeing one of the seven wonders of the world with the love of your life at 4AM.
9 Cruising
December arrives. I was itching to travel, and I had the vacation week to do it. So I said, let’s go on a cruise. He agreed. I told my mom about our plans. She and my dad like a good cruise, and so they made plans to join us. I went on a Caribbean holiday with my boyfriend of three months and my parents.
December arrives. I was itching to travel, and I had the vacation week to do it. So I said, let’s go on a cruise. He agreed. I told my mom about our plans. She and my dad like a good cruise, and so they made plans to join us. I went on a Caribbean holiday with my boyfriend of three months and my parents.
We had a smashing time. The weather was 72-degree perfection. We all rode Harley motorcycles in St. Martin and found a beach with no one else on it. We soaked in all the Caribbean sun and together successfully navigated travel in foreign places. We flew home on Christmas Eve, and I pinched myself because it was all real. Merry Christmas, darling.
10 Join My Phone Plan
It was a done deal by the end of the year (pretty much), and when my Motorola phone was dying in January, he convinced me to upgrade to a smart phone and offered to add me to his mobile phone plan. I thought I should be more cautious than to share a phone bill with someone who had been a stranger a mere four months ago, but it seemed right, given the circumstances of being in love.
I said yes.
There’s nothing quite like the beginning stages of falling in love. How did you meet the love of your life?
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